Well, happily, today some semblance of normalcy has returned to my life. I woke up this morning after having only two cluster episodes during the night. I usually have three or four. The sun was shining through the blinds and my dph and clusters had gone back to the 3-5 range, my comfort zone. The only “thing” that’s happened is that my piece of shit Ikea bed has broken and I’ve had to buy another frame and box spring that was costly.
The whole ordeal over the past few days seems to have past. I’m not going to talk to my mom or anyone related to Ohio for the next few days. I don’t want to know anything. I’ve blocked and restricted Damien on every electronic device I own. For now, I don’t want to know anything at all about him. I can’t. It caused me too much pain and suffering. I go from this point with one less nephew. At some point, he may return to a human state, but for how, he can’t exist in my universe.
The whole experience has left me tired, exhausted and mentally spent. I am unable to think or concentrate on anything I have to do today. I get lost very easily while doing the simplest of tasks, such as giving someone my credit card number. I will just lay low today and rest. Tomorrow will be better. I should be back to my normal self again, whatever that means. I live not 1800 miles from my family for a reason. I hope it’s enough.
cazandoconejos 